Analysis of PREDICAMENT

Now that many fated- years have come to past..
I often try to read in between the lines..
A venture  to skim through all that has given me joy..
It takes me a while, with the present time being in deep imprest..
Leaving me impatient.
I then close my eyes, in hope to sink in the sweet vivid evocations..
I luckily have a few,
As my eyes, hungry to stow memories barely have ever blinked, unless, of course,  when necessary!
With all that I have..I often try to flee through the meadows, bright and free,
To this river I have watched for years..
Half in rest, half in strife..
call it an epiphany, but such is life..
My life however has been stagnant for a while..
There's enough beauty around me, enough to keep my vague thoughts at bay..
 but I'm often found contemplating that this stagnant phase is here to stay..
I delve into the river and beneath my reflection I see that one pebble, pummeled into the sand.
I can't help but drown into self- deception..
In a river full of pebbles like me, i see every pebble take their journeys over me.
I often purge and pray thee,
Hoping  for a whirlpool to emerge from within, which
Brings this stagnant phase back to life..
Or atleast, half in strife..
But then, how long can one just hope, purge and pray?
Sometimes you have to be the ray!
A ray that shows direction, takes control..
I finally take that pebble that had almost gone AWOL and throw the pebble far away, far enough that it makes mulitple ripples while on its way..
Rippling the stagnant stream back to life..
If not back to life, then atleast half in strife..
Call it an epiphany, but such is life..
Such is life..