Analysis of Prison rain



Prison rain
The air in here barely quenches,
Clinging to the static.
These concrete dreams are endless
Sleeping is just a passage

Fluorescent lights cast empty shade
A night without its dark.
Muted  echoes like deadened pain
Loud yet somehow far.

Stood below the October sky in grey,
Recreational hour outdoors
The wind that wont be locked away
As rain begins to fall

Gazing skyward inviting the touch
Rain upon my face
Falling, the unguarded sky above
This element is a trace

Rolling droplets meander down
I haven’t cried for years
Nostalgia without sight or sound
Crying without tears

Out there they huddle from the rain
Head down and collars up
In here my face has found life again
Every drop a lovers touch

Laughter as a late night fire burns
Or magic across a glance
Sharing a story’s twist and turns
Immaturity in romance

A thousand yearning memories
For times I’ve not yet  lived
For sounds upon an unknown breeze
For love I couldn’t give

The years i spend within these walls
Are contained within a day
Just as prison rain will always fall
My momentary escape .


Scheme AXXXX XXAX BXBC DEXE XXXX AXXD FGFG HXHX XBCX
Poetic Form
Metre 101 01011010 101010 1011110 1011010 1011101 010111 1010111 1111 1010010101 01001011 01111101 110111 101001001 10111 100010101 1100101 10100101 11111 01001111 10011 11110101 110101 011111101 10010101 101011101 1100101 1001101 0100001 01010100 111111 11011011 11111 01110111 1010101 11101111 110001
Closest metre Iambic tetrameter
Characters 1,119
Words 231
Sentences 5
Stanzas 9
Stanza Lengths 5, 4, 4, 4, 4, 4, 4, 4, 4
Lines Amount 37
Letters per line (avg) 23
Words per line (avg) 5
Letters per stanza (avg) 96
Words per stanza (avg) 21

About this poem

This poem has been rumbling around in my head, as an outdoor worker I’ve been ground down by the adverse weather, and my mind sent me off thinking about how it could be different, like if you were in prison, and the rain was the last “free “ thing you feel, as an idea it really got me and this is the product of that avenue of thought

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Written on December 05, 2023

Submitted by Stretu on December 08, 2023

1:09 min read
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