Analysis of Ballade Of The Breakfast Table

Franklin P. Adams 1881 (Chicago, Illinois) – 1960 (New York City, New York)



When the Festal Board, as the papers say,
  Groans 'neath the weight of a lot to eat,
At breakfast, Fruhstuck or dejeuner,
  (As a bard tri-lingual I'm rather neat)
  At breakfast, then, if I may repeat,
This is what gets me into a huff,
  This is a query I cannot beat:
Why don't they ever have spoons enough?

I've broken my fast with the grave and gay,
  With hoi polloi and with the elite;
I've been all over the U. S. A.
  From Dorchester Crossing to Kearney Street.
  But aye when I sit in the morning seat
Comes to my notice the self-same bluff,
  Plenty of food, but in this they cheat:
Why don't they ever have spoons enough?

Take it at breakfast, only to-day:
  This was the layout, fresh and sweet:
Canteloupe, sweet as the new-mown hay; [Footnote: And about as edible.]
  Cereal-one of the brands[Footnote: To advertisers: This space for sale.]
    of wheat;
  Soft-boiled eggs (we've cut out the meat) :
Coffee (a claro-manila-buff) :
  Napery, china, and glasses complete-
Why don't they ever have spoons enough?

Autocratesses, forgive my heat,
  But isn't it time to change that stuff?
Small is the benison I entreat-
  Why don't they ever have spoons enough?


Scheme abxbbcbC abxbbcbC abxxbbcbC bcbC
Poetic Form
Metre 101110101 110110111 110111 101111101 110111101 111110101 110101101 111101101 1101110101 11101001 111100110 110101101 1111100101 111100111 101110111 111101101 111101011 1101101 111011110011100 100110111001111 11 11111101 100100101 11001001 111101101 10111 110111111 110111 111101101
Closest metre Iambic pentameter
Characters 1,167
Words 207
Sentences 12
Stanzas 4
Stanza Lengths 8, 8, 9, 4
Lines Amount 29
Letters per line (avg) 30
Words per line (avg) 7
Letters per stanza (avg) 218
Words per stanza (avg) 51
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Submitted on May 13, 2011

Modified on March 05, 2023

1:05 min read
41

Franklin P. Adams

Franklin Pierce Adams was an American columnist known as Franklin P. Adams and by his initials F. P. A.. Famed for his wit, he is best known for his newspaper column, "The Conning Tower", and his appearances as a regular panelist on radio's Information Please. A prolific writer of light verse, he was a member of the Algonquin Round Table of the 1920s and 1930s. more…

All Franklin P. Adams poems | Franklin P. Adams Books

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